Are You There God? It’s Me, Liz.

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A cartoon drawn by the Naked Pastor. Four boxes are shown. In the first, a rainbow sheep stands facing a wall and a white sheep at the gate. A crowd of white sheep are behind the wall. The head white sheep says, "Be patient! We're working on it! 2nd image shows the rainbow sheep sitting while the other sheep are inside the closed gate and wall. 3rd box shows a white sheep telling the rainbow sheep, "Still working on it!" The 4th box shows a pile of rainbow dust and bones where the lonely rainbow sheep sat while the rest of the sheep are safely behind the wall. The sky is dark.

The ache in my jaw told me they were coming. It always cramps when BIG tears are threatening. People walked to and fro outside of my office door, so I had to hold the body-wracking sobs at bay until I was alone. My jaw ached more. My throat tightened. I used the pain to focus and push through what I needed to do. Kids are counting on me and I was just reminded that I’ve failed another.

I made it two more hours, working to ensure that LGBTQ students feel safe in schools. (And let’s be real, hoping to change society at the same time.) Then I posted the following to FaceBook before leaving my office for home:

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Love That Feels Like Love

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“I love you whether you’re gay or straight. Or bi. Or pansexual. Or asexual. I love you whether you’re a boy or girl, or both, or neither. Not only will I love you, I will protect you and your friends fiercely. You know, I love you no matter what.”

This weekend, for the umpteenth time, I needed to make sure that my kids know that whoever they are, whoever they love, I will actively, fiercely love them.

Also this weekend, the United Methodist General Conference is meeting to discuss whether they will split over fully embracing their LGBTQ members. In 2019, many people are still confused about how to love each other in a way that makes people feel loved, which shows me they are still confused about God’s Love.

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